THE 50/50 MARRIAGE…
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“ A person who says “ I will meet you
halfway” is a poor judge of distance”. -Michael Easley
The 50/50 approach to a marriage
relationship especially when it comes to roles and responsibilities is not
always the best. These are some of the characteristics of a 50/50 marriage:
*Acceptance is based on performance:
in this case, performance becomes the basis of what holds the relationship
together. Therefore failure to perform will lead to a break down.
*The giving affection is based on
merit: in this case, the husband or wife will give affection to each other,
only when the other party deserves it or has earned it.
*Motivation for action is based of
feelings: “ I don’t feel like it”. Most times feelings are deceptive and are
prone to change. Should the way we feel stop us from doing the right thing? I
don’t think so.
*Rejection is based on focusing on
weakness: in a marriage relationship, both
spouses should go all the way in satisfying each other. Both parties will
constantly fall short of halfway because each person defines the midpoint
differently.
There is a thin line here, focusing on
the weakness of the other party should not lead to rejection, also the strength
should not be the basis for acceptance. The idea is that, either weakness or
strength, we should love our spouses all the way- 100%.
A lot of times we say “ how can I
submit, if he does not love me has Christ love the church?” or “how can I love
if she is not respectful?”If Christ loved us while we were yet
sinners, are we not supposed to be Christ-like in love?
Either way, we have to learn to love
all the way- 100% and not based on conditions. This is Christ’s way of love and
believe me, that is what marriage is meant to do to us- To teach us to love
unconditionally. This love can turn a weakness to a strength and a strength to
greater strength. Am still walking and learning y'all.
Yours in the walk...
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